God to Meet Duterte After Breaking His Promise Not to Use Curse Words
THE HEAVENS - After finding out about President Rodrigo Duterte's broken promise, God, the omniscient deity revered by millions of Filipinos will set a meeting with the Filipino strongman to reprimand him.
In an exclusive, fictional interview with The Filipino Garlic, the Good Lord Above relayed how he found out about Duterte's broken vow to Him.
"I was reading the comments on the latest Mocha Uson blog post when I heard my Duterte Curse Word Tracker™ beep with a notification. I just groaned 'not again Digong!" said God.
The Promise
The Filipino strongman Duterte is known for his macho image and the occasional "son of a bitch" directed at which head of state currently disagrees with him, usually the US President Barack Obama.
During his arrival speech in his state visit to Japan, President Duterte promised God that he would stop cursing.
Duterte said that he heard a voice while he was the only one awake in the plane saying "if you don’t stop (throwing) epithets, I will bring this plane down now."
God confirmed that he whispered these words to Duterte.
"I also told him to stop the extrajudicial killings in the Philippines but it seems he only remembered the thing about the curse words," said God.
"I also asked him to bring me some of those dried mangoes but I'm yet to receive that gift," He added.
Curse words have been the trademark of the Filipino president, especially when threatening drug pushers and users, who he claims plagues the country.
Broken Vow
On his arrival from his state visit from Japan, President Rodrigo Duterte broke his vow with a profanity-laden speech.
In an interview last Monday night in his Davao City hometown, Duterte warned policemen not to enter into illegal drugs.
“Huwag kayong magkamali pumasok diyan. Tang*na, tatapusin ko talaga kayo. Sinabi ko na sa inyo (Never enter into illegal drugs. Son of a b*tch, I will kill you. I’m telling you),” he said.
According to God, there will be much to talk about in their meeting.
However, God said He will have to talk to Foreign Affairs Secretary Perfecto Yasay just in case the latter has a different interpretation on what Duterte said.
In an exclusive, fictional interview with The Filipino Garlic, the Good Lord Above relayed how he found out about Duterte's broken vow to Him.
"I was reading the comments on the latest Mocha Uson blog post when I heard my Duterte Curse Word Tracker™ beep with a notification. I just groaned 'not again Digong!" said God.
The Promise
The Filipino strongman Duterte is known for his macho image and the occasional "son of a bitch" directed at which head of state currently disagrees with him, usually the US President Barack Obama.
During his arrival speech in his state visit to Japan, President Duterte promised God that he would stop cursing.
Duterte said that he heard a voice while he was the only one awake in the plane saying "if you don’t stop (throwing) epithets, I will bring this plane down now."
God confirmed that he whispered these words to Duterte.
"I also told him to stop the extrajudicial killings in the Philippines but it seems he only remembered the thing about the curse words," said God.
"I also asked him to bring me some of those dried mangoes but I'm yet to receive that gift," He added.
Curse words have been the trademark of the Filipino president, especially when threatening drug pushers and users, who he claims plagues the country.
Broken Vow
On his arrival from his state visit from Japan, President Rodrigo Duterte broke his vow with a profanity-laden speech.
In an interview last Monday night in his Davao City hometown, Duterte warned policemen not to enter into illegal drugs.
“Huwag kayong magkamali pumasok diyan. Tang*na, tatapusin ko talaga kayo. Sinabi ko na sa inyo (Never enter into illegal drugs. Son of a b*tch, I will kill you. I’m telling you),” he said.
According to God, there will be much to talk about in their meeting.
However, God said He will have to talk to Foreign Affairs Secretary Perfecto Yasay just in case the latter has a different interpretation on what Duterte said.
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